By Scott Brown
Updated May 13, 2006 at 04:03 AM EDT
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Malcolm in the Middle: Carin Baer

EW scientists have discovered that this weekend defies theme. A randomness pervades it, and the only solution, in the opinion of this English major, is string theory. See if you can make the connections between the following items, reader. I’ll warn you; they’re subtle.

MOVIES:

-Our own Lisa Schwarzbaum is taking the minority position on Poseidon: sez it’s good. Or “shipshape,” to use a federally mandated nautical pun.

-Not feeling it? Check out the Korean art-house noir Lady Vengeance, the latest from darkly demented auteur Park Chanwook.

TV:

-Missed the last Robot Chicken? Well, there’ll be another one Sunday at 11:30 p.m. Until then, catch up with this.

The series finale of The West Wing airs Sunday night at 8 p.m. Never fear: That nice Santos boy is going to run the country. All is well.

Malcolm in the Middle (pictured) also closes up shop Sunday at 8:30 p.m. on Fox. Oh, great Brian Cranston, we hardly knew ye. We even saw your demon monkey movie. That’s how much we love you. Frankie Muniz… well, you’ve got your racecars.

-Tom Hanks will be in the guest chair on Inside the Actor’s Studio!It’s his “revisit,” according to the site. (Has Lipton become sogodlike he can now coin his own words?) I think Hanks may be the first second-timer. Presumably, this will be the all-Joe vs. the Volcano edition. Extra points if Lipton brings up the head-rat, er, McVinci.

MUSIC:

-Tag along with the vagabond folk of singer-songwriter Jolie Holland on her new album Springtime Can Kill You.

-Or if you’d like something on the beefier side, dig into the slab of juicy hip-hop that is Gnarls Barkley’s St. Elsewhere.

BOOKS:

Carrie Tiffany’s Everyman’s Rules for Scientific Living explores the limits of rationality in the good soil of Victoria, Australia.

APROPOS OF NOTHING:

In case you didn’t know this: Senator Orrin Hatch makes music. Neither art nor science can adequately explain what you’ll find here.

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