Scanning the nation’s papers this morning, I was hoping to, er, flip, over headline writers’ creativity in discussing the new disaster remake, Poseidon. And while there were still more than a few disastrous clichés — Louisville Courier-Journal‘s soggy “Poseidon still an adventure” comes to mind — and a couple of repetitive jokes (USA Today‘s “Poseidon sinks under its own weight” and the Boston Globe‘s “Poseidon sinks of its own weight”) most of ’em held water, so to speak. Here’s a countdown of my five favorites: