TV's funniest quotes: Pick the best

”We love naked girls. They’re one of the best things in the world. It goes: naked girls, democracy, the scene in Every Which Way but Loose where the monkey gives the guy the finger.”
TED (JOSH RADNOR) GETS HIS PRIORITIES STRAIGHT ON HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER

”I don’t think that this is totally just a woman’s suit. At the very least, it’s bisexual.”
MICHAEL (STEVE CARELL), AFTER BEING ACCUSED OF WEARING WOMEN’S CLOTHES TO WORK, ON THE OFFICE

”Without the tabloids, how will I know what I’m really up to?”
TORI SPELLING, AFTER DISCOVERING THAT MAGAZINES ARRIVE A WEEK LATE IN HER NEW HOMETOWN, ON TORI & DEAN: INN LOVE

”Oh, it’s not really a team. It’s just a bunch of guys who like doing gymnastics!”
KENNETH (JACK MCBRAYER), WHEN ASKED BY DEVON (WILL ARNETT) WHAT TEAM HE PLAYS FOR, ON 30 ROCK

”Then she gives me a shalingua?a shaquarry?whatever.”
DREAMZ, TRYING TO COMPLAIN THAT HIS TRIBEMATE LISA ANSWERED A SIMPLE QUESTION WITH A “SOLILOQUY,” ON SURVIVOR

”I like Easter because it’s the only day white people can say ‘peeps’ and not sound like a complete idiot.”’
JIMMY KIMMEL, ON JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE