Greetings, bloglings, Scott Brown here. The higher-ups at EW have seen fit to lend me the keys to the Hit List, the joke sheet in the News + Notes section of the magazine. (Our man Dalton Ross — EW editor, writer, jokesmith, caterer, and wheelwright — is taking a well-deserved breather after multitasking himself into near-exhaustion. The fate of Jim Mullen is still unknown. He was last seen hunting bison.)

Here’s the thing: I’m lazy. I need setups. I need subject matter. I need, as they say, material.

So here’s how it’s going to work: Each week you’ll suggest a nice topic/target: Britney’s baby-tossing tournament, R. Kelly’s asparagus diet — maybe Laura Dern if you’re in an “alternative” frame of mind. And every week, I’ll try to hit that target. Look for my attempt at humor in the No. 10 slot on the Hit List. I’ll then sit back, switch on the blog, and let you tell me what an unfunny hack I am. This is what I live for.

We start next week.

Together, America, we can be funny!