Jake Gyllenhaal

Admit it: You love cute things. Like babies, and Koala bears, and, um, Fred Savage. But did you know you’re scientifically predisposed to get a case of the warm fuzzies when a platter of pure, unadulterated adorableness gets put under your nose? It’s true, according to an article in this week’s New York Times. Inspired by the paper’s tale of manatees and balloons — and its list of undeniable cute traits — we’ve built you a list of weekend entertainment options designed to stimulate the ga-ga receptors of your brain. Be sure to consume with an analgesic and plenty of water.

– It’s useless for you to resist ”bright forward-facing eyes,” so don’t even try. They can be found on the faces of Battlestar Galactica‘s Kandyse McClure (Sci-Fi, Friday, Jan 6, 10-11 p.m.), Brokeback Mountain‘s Jake Gyllenhaal, and even (am I crazy?), Billy Joel, whose new disc gets a B+ from EW.

– It’s also a fact that a ”side-to-side, teeter-totter gait” is cute. What’s that? Are you arguing with me? I’ve got the New York Times on my side, people. And if you’re still trying to bring the doubteration, observe Exhibit A, March of the Penguins, just out on DVD, or Exhibit B, Dancing With the StarsKenny Mayne, who (hopefully) won’t get voted off the series during tonight’s results show (ABC, Friday, Jan 6, 8-8:30 p.m.).

– Also cute? ”A big round face,” and ”a pair of big round ears.” Take a trip over to base camp for such characteristics,, and let your heart melt like butter over a bowl of hot popcorn.

Got any other endearing ideas for the weekend? Well, by all means, share ’em in the comments section below, cuties!