John Cusack, Billy Bob Thornton, ...
Credit: The Ice Harvest: Chuck Hodes

Family driving you nuts this weekend? (Come on, you can admit it. We won’t tell.) Get away from all the unconditional love and recrimination and take these five wicked entertainment offerings:

The Ice Harvest John Cusack and Billy Bob Thornton (left) are a pair of booze-loving sleazeballs trying to escape from a frozen Kansas town with $2 million they didn’t earn. EW’s Lisa Schwarzbaum calls it “the most bracing, opposite-of-gooey holiday picture to appear since Bad Santa.” In case you don’t remember, that’s the one where Santa supposedly has, um, relations with his sister-in-law.

Mr.and Mrs. Smith (Tuesday on DVD) Brangelina try to off each other. But oh, the makeup sex is good.

Family Guy (Sunday) Robert Downey Jr. lends his voice to play Lois’ long-lost brother.

A Private Hotel for Gentle Ladies A spurned housewife flees her family and undergoes a sexual awakening in Ellen Cooney’s novel, which our own Tina Jordan calls “oddly charming.”

-System of a Down’s Hypnotize While no therapist will recommend operatic freak metal to the emotionally spent, this album is surprisingly sensitive. Yes, that’s right, I said sensitive.

Take five. And call me at Christmastime.