By Amy Ryan
July 05, 2005 at 04:27 PM EDT
  • Music

After watching bits of 150 acts over 10 hours of Saturday’s 10 Live 8 concerts, I still have some unanswered questions. Anybody want to help answer these for me?

-What was upwith the painted-on masks on the faces of Michael Stipe and Kanye West’s cocktail-dress-cladstring ensemble?
-Why did Madonna flip the bird at the crowd?
-How embarrassedwas Birhan Woldu, the Ethiopian woman who survived the famine 20 years ago, that Madonna used her as a prop?
-Whathappened to Pink Floyd bassist Roger Waters’ voice?
-Who knew Tim McGraw, rocking a sleevelessvest, was so buff?
-Does Jon Bon Jovi still have the best hair in all of rock?
-Was anyone really yearning to hear Bob Geldof drag ”I Don’t Like Mondays” out of mothballs?
-What was the point of having seven channels on AOL if they were all showingWill Smith’s speech?
-Did we all miss the best music because AOL, MTV, and ABC didn’t air anything from the all-African lineups at the Johannesburg and Cornwall concerts?
-Will other artists who’ve seen their sales boosted by Live 8 emulate Pink Floyd and donate the increased royalties to charity?
-How many of these once-in-a-lifetime events, complete with all-star finales, has Paul McCartney headlined? And how many more will he have to headline?
-Why was the TV coverage so lacking in actual, you know, music?

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