TV's funniest quotes from June 9 to June 16 -- We pick our favorite quips from talk shows and sitcoms

By EW Staff
Updated June 17, 2005 at 04:00 AM EDT

”Kristen’s cute, in that I-wanna-marry-you-so-I-could-divorce-you-someday kind of way.”
DRAMA (KEVIN DILLON) TO ERIC (KEVIN CONNOLLY), ON ENTOURAGE

”Right now John’s heart is running faster than a concierge from Russell Crowe.”
HOST TOM BERGERON, ON EXHAUSTED PERFORMER JOHN O’HURLEY, ON DANCING WITH THE STARS

”You know…it may have just been an unfortunate lotion.”
RUTH (FRANCES CONROY), AFTER FEDERICO (FREDDY RODRíGUEZ) COMPLAINS THAT A BLIND DATE’S FACE WAS TOO ”SHINY,” ON SIX FEET UNDER

”Big shout-out to everybody with sleep apnea, high blood pressure, congestive heart failure! I do that too.”
D12 RAPPER BIZARRE’S CORPULENT BUDDY FAT FATHER, ON MTV2’S BIZARRE MAKES A VIDEO

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