By Lynette RiceWilliam Keck and Gregory Kirschling
September 19, 2003 at 04:00 AM EDT

MOVIES Ain’t nothing can stop Robert Rodriguez! The director just put out two movies in two months (Spy Kids 3-D and Once Upon a Time in Mexico) and here he goes again! We’ve learned that Zippy will start preproduction on a top secret thriller for Dimension this October…. Hollywood’s been trying to make a movie out of A Confederacy of Dunces since 1980, so don’t get too excited, but we hear Miramax has approached Will Ferrell about playing the Pulitzer Prize-winning novel’s fat, hot-dog-vending hero, Ignatius J. Reilly. If Ferrell gains weight, Raging Bull style, we smell Oscar! And if all goes well with the untitled Woody Allen film the actor has just officially snatched the lead in (from a reportedly uninsurable Robert Downey Jr.), we smell double Oscar!

TELEVISION Vice principal Guber, it’s your birthday! The unlucky-in-love stuffed shirt played by Anthony Heald on Boston Public is gonna be getting lucky. Sherilyn Fenn will play his love interest, whom he meets when he hits her with his car…. CBS knows from synergy: Yes, Dear will move into the Big Brother house. When Jimmy (Mike O’Malley) gets on the show, Greg (Anthony Clark) tries to break into the house to keep him from getting the boot! No airdate yet, dammit!

BOOKS Alison Arngrim played Little House on the Prairie’s evil Nellie Oleson for seven years, and, oooh, do we still hate her! But we love the title of her one-woman show, Confessions of a Prairie Bitch, which she’s turning into a book that two publishers are fighting over this very week!