Three ''Star Wars'' virgins critique the Clones. Inexplicably, they're all EW staffers
Star Wars' Virgins
Credit: Lisa Costantini, Fed Nelson and Nancy Sidewater Photographed by Ainka Shackleford

It’s not surprising that the familiar spacescape scroll at the beginning of ”Attack of the Clones” evokes nostalgia — but it’s not supposed to be for Mel Brooks. ”This is how ‘Spaceballs’ starts,” notes associate editor Lisa Costantini. She’s one of three EW staffers who’d never seen any ”Star Wars” flicks. (Yes, we are updating our screening process for new hires.) After learning of the moviegoing gap, we dragged all three to ”Clones” to learn if a virgin can truly enjoy the experience. ”This takes place in the past? It’s not in the future?” asks associate publisher Fred Nelson, who had never pondered the words ”A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.” Editorial manager Nancy Sidewater tries to figure out who’s who: ”Does Natalie Portman grow up to be Princess Leia?” But two and a half hours later, our newbies emerge not THAT confused. Whether through cultural osmosis or, perhaps, the Force, they’ve gleaned enough basic facts to connect the dots. Still, reviews are mixed. While Nelson is considering renting the other four films, Costantini feels the clones attacked her personally: ”It wasn’t as bad as I thought, but I didn’t understand a word they were saying; you need CliffsNotes. And Yoda, he was a little geeky.” Ah, get it she does.

Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones
  • Movie
  • 142 minutes