Clay gets to the matter of the bottom. Little Clay is butt fixated, says Dalton Ross, Big Ted is now Medium Ted, and -- oh, yeah -- Penny's gone
Penny Ramsey, Survivor: Thailand
Credit: Penny Ramsey: Robert Voets

Clay gets to the matter of the bottom

Ah, the bait-and-switch — a time honored Mark Burnett tradition. He went to the well again for the latest ”Survivor” episode, practically pounding you over the head the entire episode — Jake’s gonna go, Jake’s a goner, it’s gonna be Jake. So of course, you KNEW it wasn’t gonna be Jake at all, which left us with? Penny. We could talk about Penny now, but frankly, she hasn’t really done anything worth talking about, so we’ll get to her later.

Back to Jake. Homeboy has been WAY overplaying it in his trying to get every single member of Chuay Ghan to form an alliance with him, but he is right about one thing: Unless the other members of Chuay Ghan do something soon, it is going to be Brian and Clay in the finals. Assuming Jake goes next, then Brian and Clay will use Ted to vote out the women, and then (unless he can win immunity) Ted will be gone next.

Big Ted, as host Jeff Probst insists oncalling him, now has a clue that Brian has an alliance with Clay after the soft-porn star chose the Southern restaurateur to go with him on the elephant trek/Thai feast. So if Ted’s smart, he will align with Helen and Jan (assuming Jan is not too drunk) and then take his chances against them in the final immunity challenge.

But even if Ted doesn’t get that far, at least the Mark Burnett diet has enabled him to lose a good deal of weight. In fact, Big Ted is now Medium Ted. (Little Clay is still Little Clay, by the way.) Speaking of Clay, is it just me, or was he a bit ass-happy this episode? First he was talking about what a fine rear end Brian had, and then he was complimenting the elephant for its ”nice ass.” Finally, he was on the receiving end of a good-natured fanny slap courtesy of Medium Ted. I have no problem with all of this, but wonder how it’s all gonna play with Clay’s Southern buddies back home. Actually, maybe it will play just fine.

I suppose before we’re done I should offer some sort of eulogy for Penny, but I’m really at a loss here as to what to say. But hold on a second. We have message boards here, right? So why don’t YOU tell us what you thought about the girl and the game? A Penny for your thoughts?

Survivor: Thailand
  • TV Show