SWEPT AWAY

Drawn, lacquered, and just about as tanned as Goldmember, Madonna, for once, doesn’t suck as an actress. In her husband Guy Ritchie’s remake of the 1974 Lina Wertmuller screwball desert-island sex war, Amber (Madonna), a wealthy bitch, is cast away with Giuseppe (Adriano Giannini), the hunky Italian first mate she had abused and ridiculed. Ritchie cuts down on the repetitive Marxist shrillness; his version never pretends to be more than a guilty pleasure of soft-core kitsch, a kind of Last Tango in the Blue Lagoon.