Mr. Nugent, you've got 15 minutes...

1. Ted Nugent is to rock music as ______ is to a sandwich. Bread.

2. Record labels are to an artist as ______ is to a car. A dead battery — or, if you have a good label, racing slicks.

3. Rock & roll began with ______. The first primal scream.

4. Rock & roll ended with ______. Rock ain’t gonna end.

5. Talking Heads, Kiss, Cheap Trick, and Foreigner. Which band doesn’t belong — and why? Talking Heads, ’cause they never practiced playing their instruments.

6. Intensities in 10 Cities is my favorite Nugent album title. What’s yours? Full Bluntal Nugity.

7. If the heart of a band’s sound is the guitar, what human organ best describes the drums? The bowels.