Here are the season's 10 hottest moments
Here are the season's 10 hottest moments. Peanut-butter bikinis, sleeptalking, making out, and more highlights from those wacky housemates, as chosen by Bruce Fretts
Here are the season’s 10 hottest moments
Ask not for whom the belle tolls; the belle tolls for thee, Amy — again. Say what you want about the Memphis real-estate appraiser. She?s selfish. She?s a lush. She suffers from frighteningly low self-esteem. But she was great television. And now she?s gone.
So, too, will be “Big Brother 3” soon. Amy?s second eviction kicked off the third season?s final week. And what a season it?s been, thanks in no small part to Amy, who was responsible for many of the most talked-about moments, at least in my house. So before we look forward to next week?s finale — when we?ll find out if Jason the horndog virgin, Danielle the sex-goddess-to-lesbians, or Lisa the slut-turned-girl-next-door wins the half-mil — let?s look back at the 10 best things about “Big Brother 3”:
10. Amy?s little brother. After she screwed over her roomies to win a phone call — excuse me, a “T-Mobile phone call” — Amy chatted up her spooky adolescent sibling, who catatonically informed her, “I killed a lot of doves this dove season.” For a minute, I thought he was the kid from “Deliverance.” All he needed was a banjo.
9. Gerry?s personal hygiene (or lack thereof). Hey, it wasn?t his fault. The producers should have posted a Health Department notice in the bathroom: “All housemates must wash hands.”
8. The gnome-wreckers. The multiple trivia quizzes about evicted houseguests were pretty weak, but the “paint your own gnome then try to bust somebody else?s” challenge was a work of twisted genius. Even if Marcellas became way too attached to his statuette, “Boo.”
7. Getting “Hi.” Eric earned Lisa?s eternal love simply by greeting her in the midst of a tongue-wrestling session. “That?s always been my thing,” she blubbered. Guys, now you know the perfect opening line to use on her when she returns to her L.A. bartending job.
6. Amy?s nickname for Chiara. It?s hard to admit, but when the show debuted, Chiara was one of my favorites. She seemed so sweet and innocent. How wrong was I? She soon started sharing her sordid sexual history with anybody who wanted to listen — and a few people who didn?t, including bedmate Roddy and the ever-quotable Amy, who tagged her with the immortal moniker “Chi-whore-a.”
5. Josh?s ass-slaps. Despite his professed love for his girlfriend “Mewwit,” Josh proceeded to smack every female heinie he could get his hands on during his not-brief-enough time in the house. It was all part of his strategy to annoy his roommates so they?d keep him around as a weak rival for the final round. Uh-huh. “Mewwit” might buy that story, Joshy, but we don?t, you little perv.
4. “Queening out.” Gerry claimed he used his veto power to save Marcellas during the first week because he thought it was wrong to gang up on a gay African-American. But Gerry later showed his true rainbow colors when he checked out Marcellas in the shower.
3. Eric?s sleep-talking. Gerry wasn?t the only guy with Marcellas on his mind. Among Eric?s more revealing noctural admissions was his proud announcement that Marcellas kissed him on the cheek. He didn?t specify which cheek.
2. Got cheese? “Cheddar cheese, Monterey Jack cheese, Pepper Jack cheese?” What Bubba Gump was to shrimp, Amy is to cheese. Does the American Cheese Council need a new spokesmodel?
1. Two words: Peanut-butter bikinis. Or is that three words? In any event, they (barely) covered three women — Lisa, Chiara, and the surgically-engorged Tonya — and they launched a thousand websites.
What were your favorite things about “Big Brother 3”?