Chiara's gone -- and it's about time. While wondering where all those goodbye gifts come from, Dalton Ross says that Roddy's got to go next

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Big Brother
Credit: Big Brother: Monty Brinton/CBS

Chiara’s gone — and it’s about time

Ah, how the tables have turned, my friends. Remember a scant few weeks back when Amy was so distressed about being voted out of the house that she shoved ungodly amounts of cheese down her throat? Well, this week it’s her former tormentor Chiara (excuse me, ”Kiki”) who went cuckoo for Cocoa-Puffs. Not to oversimplify things, but homegirl full-on LOST IT! Did you see her make a beeline to the hammock after being nominated, and then curse out our Southern belle at every opportunity? She definitely passed the point of no return…although isn’t ”Big Brother” itself already well past the point of no return? Which would put Chiara at the point past the point of no return. Or something like that.

Whatever, she needed to go. And the housemates FINALLY, after way too much indecision, made the right call. All that nonsense about how Roddy had to go because he was the biggest threat in the house? Hello? Look around, people. Where are all of Roddy’s peeps? Eric? Gone. Josh? Gone. Tonya? Gone. And now Chiara’s gone as well. Which leaves Roddy only with Amy, who will ditch him for Marcellas when push comes to shove anyway. (Unless maybe he promises to sleep with her. Then all bets are off.) So they didn’t need to get rid of Roddy yet. Cutting off his support system was good enough.

Speaking of support systems, isn’t it cute when the couples give each other little mementos before leaving the house? Here’s my question — where the hell are they getting these framed photos? (Or the wrapping paper, for that matter?) Is there an in-house Kinko’s or Moto Photo? Do they even know what’s in these gifts, or do ”BB3” producers simply shove them under the door? At least that fake sentimentality is no worse than everyone crying after Chiara left the house. Danielle and Lisa’s waterworks had me crying tears of laughter as I tried to understand their sorrow at ousting someone they both so clearly held in contempt. And what about Gerry likening Chiara’s leaving to ”losing his daughter”? (Note to Gerry: She’s not dead. Another note to Gerry: I sooooo want to party at your multithemed house. That room with the western motif? Genius.)

And now comes the week we’ve all been waiting for, when Jason the virgin must turn to the dark side and nominate two of his fellow housemates for eviction. If Jason really wants to… Wait, hold on a second. YO, CAN YOU KEEP IT DOWN BACK THERE?!? Sorry about that, Sheryl Crow just stopped by to play me a few numbers while I type out this column. Evidently, if you read the whole thing, she’ll come to your house too and play Pictionary. (You’ve been warned.) So, where was I? Oh yeah, Jason. He’s my new favorite to win the whole thing. At first, I dug Danielle. But like Josh — at least as much like Josh as anyone can be — she’s been overplaying her hand to an annoying degree. Jason is more cool and collected. Plus, who’s gonna vote to kick him out? I mean, why don’t you just sign your soul over to Satan right then and there if you’re gonna go against a God-fearing virgin? On the other hand, maybe I’ve already done that just by devoting three full nights a week to these clowns. In that case, hell yeah!

At this point in the game, who do you want to win?

Episode Recaps

Big Brother
Big Brother

Julie Chen hosts as the houseguests battle it out.

type
  • TV Show
seasons
  • 23
rating
  • TV-14
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network
  • CBS
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