As Austin Powers in Goldmember bows, we ask celebs who’d win in a scrap between Verne Troyer’s Mini-Me and the summer’s other big little guy, Yoda.

TOM HANKS ”Yoda, because he can kind of fly.”

KATE BECKINSALE (Pearl Harbor) ”Mini-Me is probably more wiry.”

JACK OSBOURNE ”F — -ing Yoda. Mini-Me would get his mitts in, but Yoda has his kickin’ green lightsaber.”

TYRA BANKS ”Mini-Me, ’cause he’s got soul.”

HAL SPARKS (Queer as Folk) ”Yoda and his team of special-effects coordinators would send Verne to the mat.”

EDDIE GRIFFIN (Undercover Brother) ”I don’t care how much Force Yoda’s got, that little green mother’d get his ass whupped. Mini-Me would bite him in the nuts. He’d do anything to win.”

JAMIE FOXX ”Mini-Me could pull Yoda’s ears and those little white hairs.”

MICHAEL ROSENBAUM (Smallville) ”Yoda would shove his cane straight up that little bastard.”

BRECKIN MEYER (Rat Race) ”Any Jedi worth his salt would kick Mini-Me’s ass.”

THE ROCK ”Yoda. He has the Force behind him. He is the greatest Jedi that ever lived.”

ESTELLE HARRIS (Seinfeld) ”Yoda. He’s a little nicer. If you’re nice to someone — even a little bastard like Mini-Me — they have to react nicer.”

EVANDER HOLYFIELD ”Mini-Me. Yoda’s old. Mini-Me’s hyper.”

ANNE HATHAWAY (The Princess Diaries) ”Yoda. But Mini-Me would be better dressed.”

JOLENE BLALOCK (Enterprise) ”Verne’s a friend. We did a Playboy photo shoot together, but he wouldn’t stand a chance against Yoda.”

HEATHER GRAHAM ”I have to say Mini-Me because he was my little costar.”

JOHNNIE COCHRAN ”Yoda. I’d defend him any time.”




”We put him through the ugly chair but, man, is it hard to make him bad-looking.” — Road to Perdition producer Dean Zanuck, on giving JUDE LAW thin hair, crusty nails, and gummy teeth

Austin Powers in Goldmember
  • Movie
  • 94 minutes