Scenes from Woody Allen's civil trial. ''Stop talking,'' the judge tells the director, whose courtroom appearance has the stuff his movies are made of

In early June, a dramedy of errors unfolded in room 242 of the Manhattan State Supreme Court at Woody Allen’s trial in his civil suit against Jean Doumanian, 67, and her financier boyfriend Jacqui Safra, 54, longtime friends who also produced eight of his recent films. Allen, 66, claims they cheated him out of $12 million in back profits, a charge they dispute. Crimes or misdemeanors? Or farce recalling early Allen movies? You be the judge.

THE SCENE In Justice Ira Gammerman’s crowded courtroom, fans, journalists, and publicists vie for the best view. A stern-looking bailiff tries to turn away miffed Newsday columnist Ellis Henican, who winds up in a folding chair.

THE PRATFALL A member of the prosecution team accidentally knocks sketch artist Andrea Shepard’s easel into the head of fellow lawyer Tim Cummins, who falls to the floor. As Cummins comes to, the artist offers a Diet Coke compress for his bulging forehead.

THE FOREIGNER Michel Moutot, NYC correspondent for French news service Agence France-Presse, introduces himself: ”We have a lovely story here! We love Woody in my country!”

THE STAR Allen enters, clutching an olive baseball cap. Juror No. 1 wakes up. The fidgety director takes the stand and charms the jury with hands-in-the-air tales of moviemaking: ”I do wait for the weather to shoot…. New York is so much more attractive on gray, rainy days.” As Doumanian looks increasingly pinched, he testifies: ”I’ve known her for 40 years. We’re close friends, as close as family.”

THE SHTICK Allen tries Gammerman’s patience with his long-winded answers, prompting the judge to jokingly cut him off: ”Stop talking.” ”Stop talking?” the director asks incredulously. ”I’m the director here!” responds the judge, restoring order in the laughter-filled courtroom.