John explains why he's not Richard Hatch. Sure he plotted, he schemed, and he got naked -- but don't confuse this gay skinny-dipper with the first ''Survivor'' winner
John Carroll, Survivor: Marquesas
Credit: John Carroll: Monty Brinton/CBS

John Carroll, the 36-year old nurse from Omaha, wasn’t lacking in the ego department out on Marquesas. Sometimes he seemed like a great leader, but sometimes he just came off as a power-hungry jerk. Unfortunately for him, the latter image stuck with his tribemates and he became the first member of the reject jury. He called to fill us in on his abs, Richard Hatch, and why he cried after getting the boot.

Did you know everyone thought you were being cocky?
As we were walking away from the challenge, you could kind of read it on people’s faces. Those coconut-cutting things weren’t an organized witch hunt. It was like, boom boom boom. Okay, uh, that doesn’t look good. When we got back I fibbed to two of the other alliances and played them off each other and said to one that the other had told me I was going and the other way around. So I knew my number was up.

Very sneaky, John!
Well, I didn’t want to be taken out by surprise. I wanted to steal their thunder a little bit. As I was in tribal council, I wanted to make it clear I knew it was up, and I wanted tribal council to be my swan song.

Did you get to give your alliance any last words before tribal council?
I just wished them all luck and said, ”Hey I’m going. Do what you can.”

Do you think Boston Rob poisoned everyone against you?
In effect, yes, he did get me. It’s just that it took three days for me to die. As I was watching the show last week and Rob was getting voted off I was thinking, Nobody has any idea how mortally wounded I was. Once Sean and Rob arrived — the terrible twosome — they were causing all kinds of havoc. I spent so much energy dealing with the two of them that I lost track of why I was in the game. It became less about winning and more about the homophobe versus the homo.

Have you seen Rob since the show?
Actually, I haven’t seen Rob, but we talked on the phone last night. We’d spoken before and he apologized profusely for calling me queer. He totally understood. I have no grudge or ill will against him. Rob is young. I think he learned important life lessons.

Were you surprised by how emotional you got after you were kicked off?
I knew that was my Achilles heel. I’m a very emotional person. It was the fact that I wasn’t going to play the game anymore. I was missing my friends and family. I was hungry and tired from single-handedly dealing with Rob and Sean. It all hit me at that moment.

What was that about your mother not being able to retire?
My mother and I had this running joke that if I won she would retire. It was kind of tongue in cheek. I was just really missing my parents. After the show aired I was here in New York and my friends and family watched at my parents house. Everyone was crying because they knew how badly I wanted to win. I got each person on the phone and I was crying and they were crying. I told every single person something special about what they meant to me. It was a big boo hoo fest.