The folks at Liquid Generation use their latest, uh, technology — the Boobie Size Calculator — to assess the apparently ever-changing heft of Ms. Spears’ ever-popular bosom. An animated newscaster narrates the funny/alarming/sophomoric pictorial and, at one particularly eye-popping point, intones, ”What I am about to show you will shock you and…affect the very fabric of your being.” He’s not kidding. The photos — from awards shows, magazine covers, and her new movie, Crossroads — are purportedly untouched, and if that’s truly the case, then Brit (below) certainly knows her ABCs… and Ds.