Read Bruce Fretts' blow by blow account

By Bruce Fretts
Updated May 03, 2001 at 04:00 AM EDT
Tina Wesson: Monty Brinton/CBS

Survivor: The Australian Outback

  • TV Show

Tina wins in the Outback

It’s the TV event we’ve all been waiting for: Dean Cain’s guest shot on ”Just Shoot Me”! Oh, the ”Survivor” 2 finale is on, too? Here’s’s minute by minute viewer’s diary of the evening’s most outrageous Outback moments:

7:03 p.m. The show doesn’t start for nearly an hour, but the hype has already begun. On ”Extra,” ”Survivor” vet Dr. Sean Kenniff predicts Tina Wesson will win. Maybe that’s because her name comes last alphabetically.

7:06 p.m. On ”Entertainment Tonight,” Richard Hatch concurs with Sean’s diagnosis, picking Tina because the jury will have more females than males. But Susan Hawk picks Keith, saying: ”I’m going with the longshot.” Wait, is he the rat or the snake?

7:30 p.m. New York’s WCBS airs its own pregame show, ”Inside the Outback,” complete with a ”Survivor Countdown” clock. For THIS we’re missing ”Hollywood Squares”?

7:33 p.m. CBS CEO Les Moonves tells ”Access Hollywood” host Pat O’Brien that he knows where the next season of ”Survivor” will be set. Considering Moonves’ recent meeting with Fidel Castro, don’t be surprised if it’s Cuba.

8:01 p.m. The opening recap of previous episodes features one more look at Michael’s melting flesh. Hey, some of us are trying to eat pizza here!

8:07 p.m. A CBS promo promises ”A ‘Family Law’ you can’t miss!” Wanna bet?

8:13 p.m. Colby’s lips move as he reads the tree mail about the idol making. Why am I not surprised? (Memo to show creator Mark Burnett: Wood carving does not compelling television make.)

8:18 p.m.Colby says if he loses, he’s going to ”take it like a man.” Tina says she’ll have a ”crying, bawling fit.” Methinks she spent a little too much time with weepy Elisabeth.

8:22 p.m. A CBS promo promises ”a ‘Judging Amy’ you can’t miss!” Dare me.

8:23 p.m. Keith wipes his nose with his hand while cooking over the campfire. Now we know why his rice is so sticky.

8:27 p.m. As the final three walk past the extinguished torches, sappy music plays over a slo mo montage of their fallen comrades.

8:33 p.m. Jeff Probst tells the players to toss their idols into the river: ”This is a chance for you to offer something back to the land that has given so much to you.” What — litter?

8:38 p.m. A CBS promo urges, ”Don’t miss the ‘Walker’ you NEVER thought you’d see!” Uh, that’d be all of them.

8:48 p.m. The immunity challenge is a strictly intellectual exercise — a quiz about the other players. Colby wins again. Maybe he’s not so dumb after all.

8:49 p.m. Colby votes out… the deeply unpopular Keith Famie? Maybe he IS so dumb after all.

9:05 p.m. First season cutie Colleen Haskell is seen in an ad for the upcoming movie ”The Animal” alongside Rob Schneider and an orangutan. Elisabeth, this is your future.

9:13 p.m. Vengeful juror Jerri declares, ”I’m in a position of power again, AND I LIKE IT.” Enjoy it while you can — you’ll be back in a position of bartending again soon enough.

9:25 p.m. Amber’s tribal council question is: ”What three things got Colby and Tina to the finals, and what three things will they do with the million dollars?” Hey, that’s six questions!

9:33 p.m. Jerri goes fishing for apologies, asking Tina and Colby if they want to clear their consciences about anything. They don’t bite: Tina regrets searching Kel’s backpack for beef jerky; Colby says he feels guilty about voting off Alicia, Rodger, and Elisabeth.

9:41 p.m. The votes are cast: Rodger and Amber pick Colby as the winner, Jerri and Alicia go with Tina. Probst takes the ballots with him to a waiting helicopter and lifts off.

9:49 p.m. Colby and Tina watch as the chopper touches down outside an L.A. studio. Are we supposed to believe he flew from Australia to California during the commercial break?

9:52 p.m. As they await the final result, the Colbster looks like his mama has fattened him up, and Tina’s wrinkles have magically disappeared, thanks to the wonders of TV makeup.

9:55 p.m. Jeff Probst’s dimples are scaring me.

9:57 p.m. By a vote of 4 to 3, the winner is…Tina! Don’t feel bad, Colby! Your mama still loves you.

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Survivor: The Australian Outback

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