By Nicholas Fonseca
Updated March 22, 2001 at 05:00 AM EST

First, the good news: Her hair looks great. Chin length, parted down the middle, perfectly straight? and that chunking job! If nothing else, Madonna’s locks look luscious in her controversial new video, ”What It Feels Like for a Girl.”

Now, the bad news: Despite the fact that director Guy Ritchie — a.k.a., Mr. Maddie — made it look purdy, the video is a bust. Madonna speeds down the street in a canary yellow muscle car with license plates reading ”Pussy” and ”Cat.” She takes along an elderly woman — who looks a bit too much like Livia Soprano for my comfort — from Ol Kuntz Nursing Home. She rams her ride into an auto full of leering greasers. She shoots two cops with a squirt gun. A gas station blows up. Another car crashes explosively. Fade to black. ”Thelma and Louise” it ain’t. In fact, today’s little girls can probably find more empowerment copying Britney Spears’ provocative chair dance from her ”Stronger” video.

Deemed too violent for MTV, which was recently scolded by a U.S. senator after a Connecticut teen suffered near fatal burns copying a stunt from its infantile hit ”Jackass,” ”Girl” will reportedly never air again on the cable network. In a statement, Madonna defended the video’s ”ironic humor,” and if MTV’s finger wagging execs (who somehow found Robbie Williams’ stomach turning ”Rock DJ” fluff more palatable than this quasifeminist clip) are worried that teens will ape the actions of a 42 year old who’s been pushing limits for decades before Johnny Knoxville ever signed a series deal, then they’re the real jackasses. Grade: C