By EW Staff
Updated March 09, 2001 at 05:00 AM EST

”Roger Clinton lobbied his brother for several last-minute pardons for his friends, but they were not granted. The President explained to his brother that the Dukes of Hazzard were not real guys.” Tina Fey on SNL

”I’m trying to get any poor, unsuspecting person in bed with me … I’m like Michael Douglas!” Lorelai (Lauren Graham), denying accusations that she lured a man to her house for sex, on Gilmore Girls

”Remind me never to get a free chiropractic exam from a guy set up in front of a deli. All he did was adjust my boob. I guess the gloves with no fingers should’ve tipped me off.” Grace (Debra Messing) on Will & Grace

”Watching you [interview ex-Survivor Kimmi Kappenberg], I’m thinking, if Johnny Carson is watching this, he must be thrilled he doesn’t have to do this any-more …” Kevin Pollak to David Letterman, on Late Show