If the show itself isn't exciting enough for you ...
It’s midnight on Oscar night and the best-documentary award still hasn’t been handed out? Not to worry. EW offers these diversions to liven up your party this year.
— As the Crowe Flies Each time Russell Crowe (pictured) appears, a female guest must break up with her boyfriend/husband. And later regret it.
— On the Rocks After each Ping-Pong shot of recently estranged couples (Baldwin/Basinger, Quaid/Ryan, Cruise/Kidman), down your choice of icy mixed cocktail.
— Memorial Montage Martinis During the traditional ”In Memoriam” montage, down a martini every time you see someone you didn’t realize had died.
— Sunday Night Dance Fever Take turns presenting Debbie Allen-ish interpretations of the nominees. Bonus points for use of tap shoes, Riverdancing, or kung fu.
— Thanking Steven Recalling when Steven Spielberg earned an unprecedented number of onstage acknowledgments in 1999, gulp down a shot whenever Steven Soderbergh is thanked (by Benicio Del Toro, Julia Roberts, etc.). If Soderbergh himself wins, drain the entire bottle.
— Cast Away Social Club Don’t be alone Oscar night! Fashion friends out of household objects. Name them. Exchange quips. Think of the money you’re saving on chips.
— Goldie’s Lock If Kate Hudson (above) wins, how many tears will Hawn shed? Best guess wins a year’s supply of waterproof mascara.
— Adam Bluestein and I.W. Nicholson