TV's funniest lines from October 2 to 8, 1998

”This is worse than when he married the lesbian.”
ROSS’ MOM (CHRISTINA PICKLES), after he mistakenly called his bride, Emily, ”Rachel,” at the altar, on Friends

”He has a bedroom in his office so he can sleep at work? Well, that answers some questions I have.”
DAVID LETTERMAN, discussing CBS TV prez Les Moonves with guest Howard Stern, on Late Show

”The duo displayed the kind of chemistry you usually see only when divorced couples are forced to sit together at their daughter’s wedding.”
CRAIG KILBORN, about Donny and Marie Osmond’s new talk show, on The Daily Show

”This is a family show, Mr. Disney.”
KATIE COURIC, chiding Disney CEO Michael Eisner after he used the phrase ”pain in the ass” during an interview, on Today

”It’s like being partnered with a fortune cookie.”
MUNCH (RICHARD BELZER), expressing his frustration with Bayliss’ (Kyle Secor) Zen philosophy, on Homicide: Life on the Street