The funniest TV lines from the week of July 10, 1998

“During a White House state dinner, a man’s pants fell down while he was shaking hands with President Clinton. Which is rude, because proper etiquette says you should allow the President to drop his pants first.”
CONAN O’BRIEN on Late Night

“If it’s any consolation, Warren Littlefield is a moron.”
DAVID LETTERMAN, after The Last Days of Disco‘s Chris Eigeman said Littlefield once had him fired from an NBC pilot, on Late Show

“Demi Moore is splitting from husband Bruce Willis, proving that they’re finally as sick of each other as we are of them.”
CRAIG KILBORN on The Daily Show

“[In] The X-Files, David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson play two government officials who don’t have sex and believe there is a giant conspiracy out there. Actually, it’s based on Bill and Hillary Clinton.”
JAY LENO on The Tonight Show