”Five days? But I’m mad now!” Homer Simpson, complaining about the waiting period to purchase a gun, on The Simpsons

”Just be yourself. But not too much.” Monica (Courteney Cox), advising Chandler (Matthew Perry) on how to pick up a girl, on Friends

”I may be old-fashioned, but I don’t think a woman should ever call.” Paige (Joely Fisher), during a debate about whether Ellen (Ellen DeGeneres) should call a woman she’d met, on Ellen

”Donald Trump came out okay … He doesn’t have much money invested in the stock market per se. Most of his money goes into junk blonds.” David Letterman on Late Show