TV's funniest lines from August 16 to August 28, 1997

Barbra Streisand has asked the E! network’s Gossip Show not to call her Babs anymore. The only problem is now they’ve started calling her Poopy-Head.”
CONAN O’BRIEN, performing for a crowd of children, on Late Night

”He’s so antidrug he makes me look like Robert Downey Jr.”
SISTER PETER MARIE (RITA MORENO), a drug counselor, about a Muslim inmate, on HBO’s Oz

”A White House employee says [President Clinton] kissed and fondled her in an office at the White House and that it would have gone further but was interrupted by one of his illegal fund-raising calls.”
BILL MAHER on Politically Incorrect

”Yeah, I saw the Brad Pitt pictures. He’s butt naked smoking a cigarette. And the cigarette’s bigger.”
KEENEN IVORY WAYANS on The Keenen Ivory Wayans Show