TV's funniest lines from July 25 to July 31, 1997

”Jenny McCarthy was on the cover of Newsweek and Jewel was on the cover of Time last week. The weird thing was, on the cover of Juggs magazine — Franklin Delano Roosevelt.” JON STEWART, hosting The Late Late Show With Tom Snyder

”The media should take a cue from [Gianni] Versace’s clothes — cover the key parts, but leave a lot uncovered.” BERNARD KALB, criticizing the media frenzy over the designer’s murder, on CNN’s Reliable Sources

”Today is David Hasselhoff’s birthday. He said his birthday wish is that the world continues its juvenile obsession with giant breasts.” CONAN O’BRIEN on Late Night

”Next month in Martha Stewart Living, she’ll show us how to create garden mulch from unauthorized biographies.” CRAIG KILBORN on The Daily Show