1 FACE/OFF John Travolta has plastic surgery to look like Nicolas Cage. He couldn’t afford the Brad Pitt operation?
2 MY BEST FRIEND’S WEDDING Julia Roberts tries to steal the groom. It’ll be tough if he saw Mary Reilly.
3 CAROLYN BESSETTE KENNEDY Mrs. JFK Jr. won’t say if she’s pregnant. Since when is it her own business?
4 BATMAN & ROBIN Millions of people want to see George Clooney in a skintight rubber suit. And they call Michael Jackson twisted.
5 DOGS It turns out they’ve been man’s best friend for 135,000 years. That’s the year we learned saber-toothed tigers wouldn’t use the litter box.
6 DI’S GOWNS You can buy one of her ex-Royal Highness’ dresses at auction. If you can outbid RuPaul.
7 MEN IN BLACK Secret agents Smith and Jones battle evil space creatures. In between their Blues Brothers gigs.
8 RERUNS Nothing spoils a camping trip like realizing you’ve seen everything on TV that night.
9 COFFEE A study says it raises your cholesterol. But cigarettes and bacon don’t taste the same without a cuppa joe.
10 HERCULES Disney’s new cartoon about the legendary strongman. But why is he wearing Xena’s old clothes?
11 PAMPLONA The Spanish town where men let vicious bulls chase them through the narrow streets. It’s better than walking behind them.
12 GEENA DAVIS She and her action-adventure director/ husband Renny Harlin have called it quits. She wanted to have lots of hits and he didn’t.
13 MEHNDI Westerners think the temporary ritual tattoo will give them the wisdom of ancient India. That’ll be $200, please.
14 DENNIS RODMAN The NBA fined him $50,000 for insulting the Mormons. It’ll be the first money to go into Utah’s state swear jar.
15 HONG KONG It goes back to the Chinese on July 1. Let’s hope they don’t turn it into an overcrowded, noisy, expensive urban hell.