The best TV quotes from the week of March 8, 1996

By EW Staff
Updated March 08, 1996 at 05:00 AM EST

”Old habits die hard for Charlie Sheen. As a part of the divorce settlement, he left the alimony on the dresser and just tiptoed out.”
David Letterman on Late Show

”You remember that video I found of Mom and Dad? Well, I just caught the live show.”
Monica (Courteney Cox) to her brother, Ross (David Schwimmer), after catching their parents flagrante delicto, on Friends

”The networks are planning to use a ratings system like the one used by the movies. Murder, She Wrote has been slapped with an NC-65.”
Bill Maher on Politically Incorrect