1 Heat De Niro and Pacino together in a scene for the first time as rivals to the death. Over who gets top billing.
2 Sense and Sensibility You wouldn’t expect something with a title like that to feature Hugh Grant.
3 Fergie’s Jewels It’s her fault someone ransacked her luggage? You’d have thought she lost them at three-card monte.
4 Nixon By having him played by Hannibal Lecter, Oliver Stone made him warmer and fuzzier than he was in real life.
5 Crying Congresswoman Waldholtz She fell for everything her husband told her. Of course, she falls for everything Newt tells her, too.
6 Michael Jackson He enjoyed his hospital stay. He thought all the people in gloves and surgical masks were fans.
7 Bogus Talk-Show Guests You mean we’ve run out of Cross-Dressing Skinheads? Egad! The country’s being overrun by normal people.
8 Cutthroat Island Geena Davis as a swashbuckling pirate captain. Think: Thelma and Louise on a ”Fun Ship” cruise.
9 Dracula: Dead and Loving It Mel Brooks spoofs the parts of Interview With the Vampire that were off the record.
10 Special-Edition Barbie Sold out weeks before Christmas. Guess she doesn’t get along with Plan-Ahead Barbie.
11 Sudden Death Van Damme’s holiday offering of violence, greed, and revenge. That reminds me: Get a gift for Aunt Ethel.
12 Galileo’s Jupiter Probe It reports the planet’s atmosphere is uninhabitable. But then, it may have landed in L.A.
13 Jumanji Robin Williams’ jungle board game becomes real- ity. Bill Gates was playing Monopoly when it happened to him.
14 Grumpier Old Men Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon continue their feud. The Old Couple.
15 The Royal Shrink It seems Charles and Di went to the same psychiatrist. They got a volume discount.