Dylan's not alone when it comes to garbled lyrics

By Albert Kim
Updated May 05, 1995 at 04:00 AM EDT

It all started when Gavin Edwards stood tall in his second-grade chorus and belted out ”Life’s a butter dream” for the last line of ”Row, Row, Row.” ”That episode planted a seed,” says the still-mortified Edwards, ”and ever since, I’ve been collecting examples of misheard lyrics.”

Edwards, an editor at Details, has compiled the funniest examples in his new book, ‘Scuse Me, While I Kiss This Guy. Along with the usual mangling of Creedence Clearwater Revival (”There’s a bathroom on the right” versus ”There’s a bad moon on the rise”), the author cites a surprising number of food references, as in this sampling from the almost 300 garbled song lines gathered.

Wrong Lyric: ”Take your pants down and make it happen”
Right Lyric: ”Take your passion and make it happen”
From: Irene Cara’s ”Flashdance … What a Feeling”

Wrong Lyric: ”I got shoes, they’re made of plywood”
Right Lyric: ”I got chills, they’re multiplying”
From: John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John’s ”You’re the One That I Want”

Wrong Lyric: ”The girl with colitis goes by”
Right Lyric: ”The girl with kaleidoscope eyes”
From: The Beatles’ ”Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds”

Wrong Lyric: ”Doughnuts make my brown eyes blue”
Right Lyric: ”Don’t it make my brown eyes blue”
From: Crystal Gayle’s ”Don’t It Make My Brown Eyes Blue”

Wrong Lyric: ”The ants are my friends/They’re blowin’ in the wind”
Right Lyric: ”The answer my friend/Is blowin’ in the wind”
From: Bob Dylan’s ”Blowin’ in the Wind”

Wrong Lyric: ”Baking carrot biscuits”
Right Lyric: ”Takin’ care of business”
From: Bachman-Turner Overdrive’s ”Takin’ Care of Business”

Wrong Lyric: ”Clown control to Mao Tse-Tung”
Right Lyric: ”Ground control to Major Tom”
From: David Bowie’s ”Space Oddity”

Wrong Lyric: ”Jacques the monkey”
Right Lyric: ”Shock the monkey”
From: Peter Gabriel’s ”Shock the Monkey”

Wrong Lyric: ”I am a rock, I am an onion”
Right Lyric: ”I am a rock, I am an island”
From: Simon & Garfunkel’s ”I Am a Rock”

Wrong Lyric: ”Last night I dreamt of some bagels”
Right Lyric: ”Last night I dreamt of San Pedro”
From: Madonna’s ”La Isla Bonita”