Alive III

All right! Kiss Alive III! Sixteen songs, recorded live last year, spanning all stages of the career of these hard-rock troglodytes — from enduring headbangers like ”Deuce,” to more recent wink-nudge cheesefests like ”Unholy” and ”Lick It Up”! Tighter and tougher than Alive II, if not the landmark Alive! But wait — that’s not all! Music is hardly the only value of such an important artifact! Consider their between-song patter, surely among the most wonderfully inane in the entire music industry:

”Here’s a song — you probably know this one by the beginning. The song’s got a beginning where you go, ‘Oh, yeah! I know that one!”’ — Paul Stanley before ”Heaven’s on Fire”

”This song is dedicated to you — ’cause this song is about people who know what rock & roll is about! [cheers] It doesn’t matter where you’re born, it doesn’t matter where you come from, it matters where your head is at!” [bigger cheers] — Stanley before ”Detroit Rock City”

”Let me tell you my story. I got a man-sized predicament! It’s a big one! It goes like this ” — Gene Simmons before ”Domino”

”This song — it’s about what we believe in — I know it’s about what you believe in! It ain’t bulls— when you say, ‘Rock & roll all night [and] party every day!”’ — Stanley before, well, you know…

”CRRANNNGGG!” — smoke bomb during ”I Was Made for Lovin’ You”

You gotta love these clods! B