The 15 hottest topics the week of May 31, 1991

1. Hugging her majesty
Prince Philip was shocked. He’s never done it.

2. Cannes
Boring. Don’t let the Palme d’Or hit you on the way out.

3. Spiro Agnew
Proof that you can never make too much fun of a living vice president.

4. Blockbuster Movie Weekend
The studio execs’ holiday: ”What are all these people doing at the beach when they could be at a movie?”

5. The Lost and Found Patrol
So after all these years the Bermuda Triangle turned out to be so much hooey. What’s next? Bigfoot a hoax?

6. The Kennedy Crime Family
The Cozy Nostra. Full of colorful characters we know and love: Ted ”The Senator,” Willie ”The Doctor,” ”12-Step” Joan, and ”Ambassador” Joe.

7. Jose Canseco/Madonna
Let’s not read anything into this. Maybe they’re just having sex.

8. Bill Parcels
One small step for man, one Giant surprise for mankind.

9. Not the Momma!
This month’s catch phrase comes from Dinosaur baby talk. Very kewt.

10. George McGovern
Tired of the rat race? Want some peace and quiet? Become a Democratic presidential candidate.

11. Bill Murray
He has perfected the fine art of acting stupid. Or is it a craft? More like a knack than a craft. Or a skill, maybe

12. Tequila Pops
The preteen rage in California. These alcohol-free lollipops taste like tequila and even have a worm.

13. Steppercise
The emperor’s new exercise gimmick. People actually pay money to step on and off a padded box. There’s a stepper born every minute.

14. Dirty Disco
”I Touch Myself”? ”I Wanna Sex You Up”? What ever happened to double entendres?

15. Brian Bosworth
A biker’s biker. A dumb jock’s dumb jock.