Our solution for ailing TV networks -- We introduce hybrids of the ''Fresh Prince of Bel Air'' and ''Dallas,'' ''Full House'' and ''48 Hours,'' and other shows that could help ratings

Our solution for ailing TV networks

You’re a desperate network executive in search of ratings salvation. With no budget for new shows, you decide to graft your Nielsen turkeys onto popular but aging series in need of new juice. What do you get? A new form of TV hybrid ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY calls the ”sitcombo.”

The Fresh Prince of Dallas
The lanky illegitimate result of a J.R. Ewing business trip to Philadelphia comes home to Southfork. While learning the ropes of the oil business, he teaches Patrick Duffy to rap, only to discover later it’s all been a dream.

Totally Hidden Roseanne
May not be feasible.

Designing Young Riders
Pony Express hunks discover the incomparable joys of calico and gingham.

Murphy & the Fatman
William Conrad becomes Candice Bergen’s latest secretary and personal private investigator.

A Different Caller
Each week, a different cast member of A Different World replaces Gary Cole in the booth.

Twin Doogies
Identical precocious medial residents mysteriously appear in a doughnut-obsessed Pacific Northwest town and open a strange chiropody practice.

Rescue Father Dowling
By telephone, William Shatner saves that mischievous priest from ungodly injury each and every week.

America’s Funniest Jane Pauley
Jane sits on a whoopee cushion, tries to touch her nose with her tongue, and accidentally swallow a fly in hilariously candid video footage shot by her cartoonist husband, Gary Trudeau.

Dear 60 Minutes
Judd Hirsch leads a psychiatric support group for self-important journalists divorced from reality.

Get a Golden Girl
A geriatric Love Connection hosted buy Chris Elliot.

Major Babes
Gerald McRaney imposes a little U.S. Marine Corps discipline on Charlene, Marlene, and Darlene.

Matlock… With Children
No, Opie’s not back, nut close enough. An Atlanta lawyer is put on retainer by the Bundys as they try to disown their juvenile-delinquent son.

Unsolved MacGyver
Reality-based call-in show allows pre-schoolers to solve Richard Dean Anderson’s weekly crisis.

Anything but Parker Lewis
In an endless flashback to their California high school, teens Jamie Lee Curtis and Richard Lewis tease each other mercilessly,.

Prime Time Matters
Nerdy kid-next=door Steve Urkel replaces Sam Donaldson and Diane Sawyer and the ratings take off.

Full 48 Hours
Two incredibly long days of behind-the-scenes single-dad sitcom coverage.