Stephen Colbert experienced first hand what it’s like to be a Russian oligarch. The Late Show host palled around with Mikhail Prokhorov, the billionaire owner of the Brooklyn Nets basketball team, during his trip to the land of Vladimir Putin. Colbert toured Prokhorov’s estate, tasted an “oligarch snack,” and, more importantly, set up Prokhorov’s Tinder profile.
“I’m gonna put down, ‘I made my fortune mining, but I haven’t found my gem.’ They’re gonna melt,” Colbert joked.
The interaction was bumpy to start, as Colbert couldn’t figure out if Prokhorov was joking about cutting off his toes. But he got more comfortable as he toured the billionaire’s secret room filled with an AK-747, throwing stars, and coffee table books with photographs of naked women. Prokhorov also has a yacht and he doesn’t know where it is. “You’re living the perfect life of an eighth-grade boy,” Colbert joked.
Hitting the road in a “relaxed oligarch look,” our late-night host found his “billionaire thing,” that one crazy thing Prokhorov does that seems normal to him because he’s a billionaire. Every day, Prokhorov heads to a private school that “looks like the architect was smoking weed” to study Tibetan tescao martial arts.
“You’ve got a clubhouse painted in Dr. Seuss colors,” Colbert exclaimed. “It’s got a dungeon in it where you throw axes at the wall. You’re an honest-to-God oligarch.”
Watch Colbert party like an oligarch in the clip above.