Last season, Josh McDermitt was kind enough to clue us in on what Eugene was doing back in Alexandria while the rest of the gang was busy murdering people in their sleep at weird satellite stations. Now, it seems Eugene has gone missing again!
Sure, Rick has been fighting weaponized junkyard walkers and slicing zombies in half on the highway. Sure, Daryl has been alternating between beating the crap out of people and spending intimate moments with a tiger. And sure, Jerry has been busy preparing cobbler. But what has Eugene been up to since Negan took the mulleted-wonder with him back to the Sanctuary? We’ll get a look at that on Sunday’s Feb. 26 episode, but why wait until then? Here, McDermitt provides us with his list of the five things Eugene has been doing at the Sanctuary over the past two episodes.
1) Snip Snip!
Negan made Eugene cut his luscious mullet. This was probably the most torturous thing that could’ve happened to Eugene. Even if Eugene had been on the receiving end of Negan’s bat way back at the beginning of the season, I’m sure the last thing to go through his head (beside’s Negan’s bat) was “I hope my hair is okay.” Let’s be honest, Eugene is the mullet, and the mullet is Eugene. They are one in the same. A true icon.
2) Organize a Zombie Whack-A-Mole tournament bracket
We’re coming up on March Madness, and since the NCAA isn’t around in the apocalypse (as far as we know), Negan has been jonesin’ for some tournament matchups. First up? Dwight vs. Walkers from the University of Maryland University College.
3) Apology Letters
Negan has forced Eugene to write apology notes on his behalf for killing Glenn, Abraham, Spencer, and Olivia. Mostly because Negan can’t read or write and this upsets him. This deep-seeded frustration might be the source of Negan’s anger. Besides cutting the mullet, this is the cruelest thing you could do to the Eugene.
4) Get the band back together!
Negan forced Eugene to start a rock band with some leftover animatronic figures from the Chuck E. Cheese Band. The only song they know how to perform is “Easy Street,” the same song used to torture Daryl. Several dates have been added around The Sanctuary. Attendance is mandatory.
5) Eat spiders and scorpions with Angelina Jolie’s children
…Don’t knock it till you try it!
The Walking Dead airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on AMC. Click here to keep up with McDermitt’s weekly episode analysis posts.