For the first time this season, an episode ended and I wasn’t on the edge of my seat. Maybe it’s because the two biggest twists involved characters I haven’t gotten close enough to yet — Abby and Meredith. Or maybe I’m just depressed because Elijah is packing up his suits and leaving town. That’s probably it. I’m struggling to find the enthusiasm to type my usual “Let’s dig in.” Every graf just brings me one step closer to losing him again. Here we go…
So the morning after Esther’s ball, Elena awoke and immediately tried to call Stefan, who was already up journaling. Who freeze-framed to see what he was writing? That was a missed opportunity. It could have been something like, “I really thought The Vow would make me cry, but it didn’t.” Instead, it was something about how closing himself off and burying his feelings is better than wallowing in self-loathing. Hate to break it to you, Stefan, but if you’re journaling, your feelings are not being buried. Elena called Damon for the 11th time and he finally picked up. He assured her he was over being mad at her — he rolled over and there was Rebekah. I wouldn’t have thought she’d stay the night, but she did… so that when Damon opened the front door for her to leave wearing the gown she had on the night before (I expected more damage), Elena could be standing there to bust them. After the shock of seeing Damon with the vampire who tried to kill her less than 48 hours earlier wore off, Elena told him about Esther’s plan to kill all her children. Elena was feeling bad about Elijah, who’d found a way to keep her alive before the sun and the moon ritual, but Stefan agreed with Damon that Elena couldn’t tip him off and risk Klaus living.
Technically, Elijah figured out something was wrong on his own. After Kol made a lewd comment to Rebekah about being loose and guilted Klaus into going to the Grill with him (how long does he get to play the “it’s the least you can do after sticking a dagger in my heart” card?), Elijah told Rebekah he’d found burned sage — which meant their mother had done a privacy spell. Funny that she would be so worried about PRIVACY and then not get rid of the evidence of the spell that would tip Elijah off to her deception. Rebekah wanted Elijah to talk to Finn, but Elijah confirmed that Finn has always hated being a vampire. He had to talk to Elena again.
But first, Elena had Bonnie practicing the privacy spell, for what purpose we never learned. It didn’t work. Caroline could hear Elena telling Bonnie about Damon the Vampire Gigolo and Bonnie telling Elena that Esther had come to see her and her mother that morning. Since Esther was channeling the power of their entire ancestral bloodline, she wanted to introduce herself and invite them to join her during the full moon that night. She needed both of them to maintain the connection to the bloodline so she could have enough power to reverse the spell that made her children vampires and kill them when they reverted back to their human state. Anyone else wondering why she had to kill them once they were human again? They’d no longer be vampires. They’d be mortal and die soon enough. I wonder if the witches wanted them dead to pay for their sins, or if it was Esther, who we found out had been forced to spend 1,000 years feeling the pain of their victims. All I’m saying is, the balance would have been restored without them dying.
NEXT: Let’s rewind that bench scene