ICYMI on Friday’s episode: As we are the-few, the-ashamed who are still entertained by Utopia, we’re only recapping the show on Tuesday at EW; but rest assured, if Bri is screaming about peanut butter on a Friday episode, you’re still going to hear about it here. I would never deprive you of a description of what must have been the world’s most nasal argument since *NSYNC broke up (JK, that was totally amicable).
Yes, there was trouble in paradise as Bri apparently dropped a bunch of peanut butter on the floor and expected Chris to just clean it up for her. And instead of using the defense, “In my utopia, I don’t have to clean up my own peanut butter”—because isn’t that what this whole show is about?—she’s all, “before you come into my barn and start yelling at me, you need to get your facts straight.” But the facts are that Bri is pretty annoying, definitely a little lazy, and only says about two-thirds of the necessary syllables in any given word. Their fight is only worth mentioning because it results in hilarious sentences like these from Chris: “All we are is Bris, y’know?! I don’t even have my own voice, my own name. I came here to be me.” You do have your own name, Chris; it’s Chris. Stop calling yourself Bris. That is not a name.
But the most important turn of events on Friday’s episode was Dedeker reminding everyone that they’re living in filth, away from their families, because this whole shindig is supposed to be a social experiment, so they need to start shaking things up. A quick poll and drawing names out of a hat results in Hex getting to pick the next form of government they try out. Anarchy, it is! She explains that anarchy isn’t chaos, it’s just abiding by a human moral code, but I have seen The Purge—okay, I have seen The Purge previews, because that movie looks terrifying—and I know that she is lying. The second you take away laws people start making murder dungeons and lighting everything on fire. Everybody knows that.
“I’m the most giving, loving person I know” – Bella
When the Utopians decide that everyone can do what they want on Friday’s episode, Aaron and Kristen immediately order a ton of expensive luxury food items without telling anyone about it, but no one seems to really get mad or take them into their murder dungeon or anything. But at the beginning of tonight’s episode, when a water filter—the phrase that would surely show up as the second largest on Bella’s word cloud (you know what’s first)—arrives for Bella without anyone else knowing about it, everything goes to hell. I don’t want to stick up for Bella. I really do not; if I lived with her, I know I would Purge her right out of there. But she is correct that everyone picks on her because she’s an easy target.
The funny thing about this show is that its original intent was to open our eyes to how a different kind of society could prosper, be more unified, find peace… or something like that; but really, it’s been most successful in just reinforcing ideas we already know about our society: tonight, it’s that sometimes you just have to deal with weirdos. And if you think that’s not true, then you are one of those weirdos. Bella is one of those weirdos to be dealt with, and Amanda tells everybody as much after Bella says she can’t take the abuse anymore. Josh convinces Aaron to be gentler with her, and he gives her a sweet apology, which she promptly follows up with a patented Bella pep talk, which is to say, Bella speaking aloud to Bella while giving Bella a hug, reminding everyone that if anarchy is really all about morality and treating people with respect, then Bella will be their greatest test.
NEXT: What happens in the crawl space below the barn, stays in the crawl space below the barn…