This is how you do an episode of True Blood that moves: We got to the bottom of “the Obamas” and what should be the final appearance of the Ifrit, while still having time for Lafayette to be awesome, Sam to be naked, Alcide to wear his leather jacket, Pam to meet the new sheriff in town, and Steve Newlin to get a pet (sadly, it’s Emma). Now if we could just stop Bill from being such a tool. I’m all for Stephen Moyer getting to play something other than the dark knight in shining armor. But bad guys are supposed to be more fun and they’re not when they’re being brainwashed. To quote Cougar Town, slap out of it!
The new Authority began the hour celebrating the bombing of a Tru Blood factory outside Houston by feeding on a naked man played by an actor who I assume will tell all of his friends that the table he was chained to was very cold. Eric and Bill joined in the festivities, but Eric was simply going through the motions. He found Molly, and after a rough start — “Put the baby fangs away before you piss me off,” he said — they assessed their predicament (“We’re totally f—ing f—ed,” she said) and came up with an exit strategy that she admitted would probably get Eric killed.
Later, Eric got Bill alone, and Bill told him he wasn’t pretending: He’s lost. Everything he believed in is upside down if Lilith is real and God is a vampire. Eric tried to tell him they hadn’t seen Lilith, they were just high as kites. You thought Eric got through to Bill when he asked him if Sookie was just food to him now. He told Bill to get Salome’s blood, and he’d get Nora’s. They’d use their DNA to break out before dawn and Bill could have his crisis of faith elsewhere. In the meantime, they’d go back to slaughtering people in the name of God.
Eric eventually approached Nora as she was worshipping at the Bottle O’ Lilith. Nora revealed that Salome had been sneaking her in there and feeding her Lilith’s blood while Roman was still alive. Eric was convincing when he told Nora that he didn’t want to fight with her anymore and asked her to help him believe. She kissed him, and they presumably had offscreen makeup sex. Bill, meanwhile, was in topless, dancing Salome’s bed. She told him Lilith had chosen him. They started boning, and Bill saw Sookie’s face and bit her neck. Then he saw bloody Lilith, who likes to be on top. He bit her, and when he pulled back, he saw he really had bitten Salome. So he had her blood. Bill ultimately met up with Molly and Eric (with a drugged Nora in tow) in the elevator bay, but when the elevator doors opened, Salome was there with guards. Eric had human-like tears in his eyes when he called Bill a traitor. Eric had no choice but to surrender. I hope we see more of him and Molly plotting together. They’re fun.
NEXT: Pam has a great line — shocking!