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The Real Housewives of Dallas recap: Mad as a Hatter

The ladies break out their finest (and not-so finest) hats for (another) charity function

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The Real Housewives of Dallas

TV Show
Current Status:
In Season
run date:
Amazon Video
Reality TV

Previews for The Real Housewives of Dallas promised that the drama would be big because…Texas, but last week’s premiere episode fell a little flat. But with its second episode, the drama has delightfully picked up.

That drama surrounds a Mad Hatter’s charity function and the lack of manners brought to said event — with Brandi being the biggest offender. She shows up wearing a homemade hat that has plastic pieces of poop attached to it. So yes, the potty humor continues, but LeeAnne is having NONE of it. Read on as we break down the second episode of RHOD.

Cary’s Magic Junk

MARY SOLLOSI: Let’s start at the top! So Cary said her husband lost 80 pounds because—

C. MOLLY SMITH: Because of her “magic junk.” This is a family-friendly website, so we’ll just sum it up as they have great cardio workouts together. What a gem that Cary.

MARY: But I love Cary and Mark’s trilingual daughter.

MOLLY: She is so fabulous. She might be the most fabulous part of RHOD, with her sunglasses and very indifferent attitude.

MARY: I’m getting shades of Johan and François, from RHONY. Just rolling into the room, speaking eight languages, wearing sunglasses. Being like, “No, none of the above, bye,” and leaving. She’s already in the running with Milania for No. 1 Housewife offspring.

The Making of the Poop Hat 

MOLLY: So Brandi and Stephanie made their hats for the Mad Hatter’s charity soiree.

MARY: Brandi calls her Mad Hatter’s chapeau the “poop in the park” hat… So I guess the potty humor is still happening.

MOLLY: Every once in a while that stuff works, like that scene in Bridesmaids, but that can’t be the basis of your sense of humor.

MARY: It’s all they have!

MOLLY: When they were making the hat, Stephanie told Brandi that she emailed LeeAnne, which I felt was kind of shady.

MARY: It was a little shady, even though I agree with Stephanie on the way she feels about things. But I also appreciate that she told Brandi because if Brandi had heard about it later from LeeAnne, that would have turned into such a scene. And it says a lot that she let Brandi read the whole thing. She wasn’t throwing Brandi under the bus.

MOLLY: Alright, the actual email was nice.

MARY: Stephanie’s trying to be conscientious of her position, and Brandi is screwing herself over one step at a time.

MOLLY: I feel like it’d be nice if Brandi and Stephanie could meet somewhere in the middle. Stephanie seemed to be trying too hard to act the part, and Brandi tried too hard to act opposite of the part.

Relationship Drama at an Awkward Barbecue

MOLLY: So LeeAnne and Tiffany and their respective beaus got together for a cookout…

MARY: When LeeAnne said, “We were party girls; we got kicked out of clubs,” I was thinking I’d like to see that!

MOLLY: Tiffany alluded to all this craziness that went down at the Playboy Mansion but didn’t elaborate. I’m like, please (no seriously, please) continue!

MOLLY: There was also all the talk about marriage. We’ve seen a little bit of this in the previews, so I think the marriage stuff is going to amount to some drama.

MARY: It was getting uncomfortable the way it was going this time. LeeAnne’s boyfriend actually called her “desperate.” On television!

NEXT: “The monster of the sea has come. She washed up on the Paris shore.”