Now that Sheldon and Amy are living together, it’s time to make Penny’s apartment their own. For Sheldon, redecorating means taking everything from his old apartment and moving it across the hall. For Amy, it means returning what she gifted her bestie back in season 5 to its rightful owner. That’s right, people. The painting of Amy and Penny is back, in all its hideous glory!
Penny is delighted (read: mortified) the painting is once again in her possession. Amy’s selfless act beautifully segues into Sheldon suggesting he and Leonard divide their mutually owned property. Who should get the beloved Game of Thrones sword? Penny offers it to Sheldon as a precaution: She doesn’t want to accidentally stab someone while defending herself from Painting Amy, who visits during her nightmares.
Sheldon calls dibs on the avocado plant, the Mr. Spock cuckoo clock, and the 3D chess set. He doesn’t want Leonard to suffer from a physical reminder of a game he never managed to win. How thoughtful! Sheldon defends his selfishness. He skipped kindergarten, so he never really learned how to share.
Leonard says he doesn’t want anything other than the official apartment flag. Sheldon recognizes this passive-aggressive behavior and stalks right out of the apartment. He retaliates by changing the Wi-Fi password. Leonard storms over to Sheldon’s apartment with a message: Game on.
Sheldon: “If it’s like your 3-D chess game, you’re out of your length, width, and depth. Amy, get the Neosporin. Somebody just got burned.”
Leonard: “Alright. I tried.”
Sheldon: “Alright, I tried? That should be the title of your autobiography. Oh! A second-degree burn!”
Amy: “I got the Neosporin. Who got hurt?”
Later, Sheldon finds Leonard doing laundry in a toga made out of — you guessed it! — the apartment flag. As an added bonus, he’s naked underneath. The horror! Sheldon strikes back hard. When Penny and Leonard come home that evening, there’s a vagabond making a sandwich in their kitchen. Great Scott, it’s Christopher Lloyd! He explains a tall guy dressed as a little boy rented him a room for a dollar a night.
His name is Theodore. He has O-negative blood, thinks the painting is of Penny and her mother, likes to eat chips in Sheldon’s spot, and has discovered just enough change in the couch cushions to stay an extra day at Hotel Hofstadter.
Once again, Leonard marches over to Sheldon’s place to confront his friend. Leonard asks how Sheldon could be so selfish; Sheldon wonders why Leonard would go out of his way to hurt him; Theodore questions if all this anger is coming from love; and Amy inquires after the homeless man who makes a good point. Leonard and Sheldon apologize and make up for being so rude to each other. Sheldon even proposes Leonard keep the apartment flag, offering to rub his own genitals on the material to make things even. Again, how thoughtful.
In other news, Stuart offers Bernadette and Howard a book of coupons in exchange for room and board for a few days/weeks/years, since he recently found out he’s been evicted from his own place. Won’t an extra hand be helpful when the baby comes? Bernadette agrees to a trial run and Stuart pulls out all the stops. He makes dinner, offers parental advice, and paints Bernadette’s toenails. The new arrangement bothers Raj. There’s already an emotional third wheel in this relationship and there’s no room for a fourth.
Raj and Stuart begin competing for best villager in the old “it takes a village” adage. They fight over who gets to put a crib together, which animal should hang from the baby mobile, and who gets to go to the market for groceries. When Bernadette shouts for Howard to come into the kitchen, Raj and Stuart beg for him to let one of them answer the call. While Howard decides who will do his wife’s bidding, a frustrated Bernadette enters the room.
She’s in labor. The baby is coming! Will the little Wolowitz bundle of joy have a blue-light saber or a pink one? May the force be with the entire gang as they maneuver their way through parenthood. Full speed ahead at 1.21 gigawatts!
Leonard: “You’re good at revenge. How do we get them back?”
Penny: “My go-to move is to sleep with the person’s boyfriend, but I feel like I’m already doing that.”
Howard: “It’s like we have a butler. If I had a bat suit, I’d be Bruce Wayne.”
Bernadette: “You have a bat suit.”
Howard: “It’s pajamas. There’s no cape.”