I don’t know about you, Bachelorette fans, but I really needed a drink to calm my nerves after last night’s finale. My heart could barely take the suspense! The good news is, after a long, arduous ”journey” — because love don’t come eeee-zay, after all — our Jillian managed to make the right decision. Go, Canada!
Before we begin, a brief programming note: If you’re a fan of Chris Harrison’s blog — and who isn’t? — don’t panic! His final entry will post Wednesday morning (July 29), so you’ll get his thoughts on both the finale and the sure-to-be ridonkulous After the Final Rose special. Speaking of which, my fellow Bachelorette-aholics Michael Slezak and Mandi Bierly will be live blogging the ATFR special tonight (July 28), starting at 10 p.m. eastern time. Don’t miss it!
Now, let’s get to it. The finale begins with Jillian standing on the balcony overlooking the Big Island of Hawaii, contemplating her ”incredible” Bachelorette ”journey.” I found myself contemplating right along with her… After watching this show for 117 years, I am shocked to discover that part of me still gets emotionally involved with the people foolish enough to participate in it — and that part of me really wants Jillian to leave Hawaii on the next plane, find a good therapist in Vancouver, and work on rebuilding her crumbling self-esteem. Then there’s the part of me that knows this whole situation is really nothing but a game show. You’ll find that part of me shouting at the television: ”Suck it, Kipper! Ed is going to take you down! Enjoy your ride in the reject limo, buddy!”
Anyhow, before she can make a final decision, Jillian needs Mom and Dad to meet Ed and Kiptyn. Ed’s up first, and even though their fantasy suite malfunction ”messed with both of our heads,” Jillian is still very smitten with him: ”How can I ever think about letting this guy go?” Dolphin squeal! It’s time for a reunion with Peggy, Glen, cousin Tori, and Granny! Gran, who anointed Jason’s head with Canadian-flag boxers last season, remains as randy as ever, assessing Ed with a blunt: ”Terrifically good looking, huh?” Figuring that honesty is the best policy, Ed jumps right in and tells the Harris clan the truth: ”I was married to my job, and I let it get to me pretty badly,” he admits. But, he continues, as Jillian smiles lovingly, ”I just could not stop thinking about this woman.”
Peggy seems pleased by Ed’s devotion to her daughter, but she’s not gonna let him off easy. The last time we met Peggy, she wasted no time grilling Jason (remember that looong scroll of questions she unfurled as a ”joke”?) and this time is no different — though she’s only got 66 questions for him, rather than the 76 she had for Jason. Here’s what we learn: Ed wants three kids, he sees himself and Jillian retired in Hawaii in 30-40 years, and he knows their relationship will last because they have ”honesty and love.” While she’s struggling to remain the stern inquisitor, Peggy can’t deny she’s impressed. ”Really good answers,” she says simply. Glen is the same stoic and sweet guy we met last season — and he seems convinced when Ed says he wants to be with his daughter forever. So when Ed asks for his blessing, in his roundabout way (”If I were to ask her to marry me, how do you feel? What do you think?”), Dad is accommodating. ”I would be really quite happy to see that take place,” he tells Ed. ”I’ll be doing somersaults.” (Of course, Dad really just wants Jillian to be somebody’s wife, ASAP — as he tearfully told the camera last season, ”If Jillian gets married, you’re going to see a pretty happy guy.”)
NEXT PAGE: Jillian’s family has a clear favorite