Well guys, we’re back. And I know what you’re thinking: Our Bachelor is “just a normal guy” who likes to participate in physical activities in and/or around a barn. But don’t worry. This is not going to be a repeat of 2015 with Chris Soules (though I wouldn’t object to Ben doing some push-ups on bales of hay). Instead, our 2016 Bachelor is simply visiting his small hometown and playing some b-ball to symbolize that he’s ready for “another shot” at love. So yeah, this show’s just as subtle as it was in 2015.
Regardless, this sweater-loving 26-year-old man is ready to find love, and he’s got the haircut to prove it. (Now if only someone would tell him that Warsaw, Indiana, is not an accurate representation of all of America, we’d be set.)
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What you need to know is this: Ben Higgins was rejected by Kaitlyn Bristowe on the most recent season of The Bachelorette, despite being very nice and very attractive. Also, he’s young, he loves the word “incredible,” and he likes to lean on things and look contemplative while standing in large fields. Did I mention that he’s young?
Catching up with Ben’s parents, we discover the very evident theme of the season. Remember that time Ben claimed he felt “unlovable” during Kaitlyn’s season? Me neither. But apparently, it really struck a chord with someone. To be honest, all I remember from that season is Shawn’s tight T-shirts and that one time Kaitlyn slept with Nick. But somewhere in between that, Ben said he felt unlovable, and it was in that moment that ABC realized its one true purpose: to make Ben feel loved.
And as far as Ben’s mother is concerned, she has nothing but words of support for her son: “She’s gonna be great no matter where you find her,” she tells him. Clearly, mom’s never watched this show. You really might want to watch what you say there, ma.
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On his way to find the future Mrs. Higgins (hope she’s okay with changing her name!), Ben takes his new haircut to Los Angeles, where he meets up with “three of America’s favorite Bachelors,” otherwise known as the now-married Sean Lowe, the now-married Jason Mesnick, and Chris Soules, who just so happened to be in the city at the time.
Here to give Ben “helpful” advice, they go back and forth about how many women he should kiss. Chris says all of ’em! Sean says just to be careful not to do it in front of the other girls. Jason gives the advice to not “close off anybody.” (And in his case, he means not even AFTER the final rose ceremony.)
Chris’ final words of sage wisdom are that Ben is going to find something that he likes in every single woman. (Translation: Chris secretly loved Ashley S.!) The real moral here is that Ben’s job is to make sure that everyone is comfortable (and hopefully he knew that before the guys told him).
With that, the Bachelors head out so that Ben — who gets a hotel room and not his own place? — heads to change for night one on his journey to find
love that he’s lovable.
NEXT: It’s arrival time…