If I’ve learned anything this week, it’s that Bali is incredibly humid, monkeys really like their bananas—which is not a euphemism—and you don’t have to set aside all fashion to hang out in a sacred temple. But none of that is directly relevant to Chris Soules’ love story, so let’s get to it, shall we?
Kicking things off in Bali, which Chris claims is “a long ways from Arlington”—isn’t everything?—we watch as Chris goes through at least six different outfits during his opening montage, where he talks about overnight dates and perfects the art of the hands-on-the-hips pose. Seriously, how many checked bags do we think the show made Chris bring? “You need at least four pink shirts, Chris. It’s kind of your thing.”
First up for the all-day (and hopefully all-night) date is Kaitlyn, who is finally ready to let her guard down. The couple start the date at a temple, where Chris asks his date the first thing you’d think to ask someone in this situation: “When’s the last time you’ve been in a temple?” Tell me the truth, guys. Is this a common thing or am I just really inexperienced? Should I have been hanging out in more temples in my youth?
After balancing baskets on their heads, Kaitlyn and Chris experience the joys of getting to know people despite a language barrier, which Chris is shockingly good at… because he doesn’t have to, you know, use actual words to communicate. Instead, he uses hugs. (That is, except with the two monkeys crossing the road, because they are clearly fans of Ashley S. and are still pissed that Chris sent their leader home.)
With each passing moment of their date, Kaitlyn and Chris grow sweatier until they finally enter a jungle where they learn how to feed bananas to monkeys. Basically, you hold up the banana and pray that the monkey takes it without hurting you. And as Chris learns, if they pee on you, you just go with it.
In one way, Kaitlyn wishes she were a monkey. No, she doesn’t want to pee on Chris—but that would’ve been a twist—but she respects the way they go after what they want. With that in mind, she and Chris find a place to sit, sweat, and peck each other’s faces off. Long story short: Her family really liked him, specifically her stepdad. What did they talk about? We (still) will never know.
At dinner, it’s either raining or the sky is crying from all the humidity, but Kaitlyn finally opens up and tells Chris about her fear of loss. But she doesn’t have one negative feeling about their relationship at this point, and yes, she’d love to check out the fantasy suite.
Fantasy suite number one comes complete with a bed, booze, and a bathtub full of roses? So, like, can they take a bath or is that not allowed? But Kaitlyn’s not worried about it. She tells Chris that she’s falling in love with him and he tells her that he’s falling for her as well. Wait, can he say that? I miss the days of Trista trying desperately to tell Ryan everything with her eyes (and her body).
Regardless, after that day of unintentional hot yoga, here’s to hoping those two have shower sex. (Brief aside: Will Britt ever have shower sex? Food for thought.)
NEXT: Whitney and Chris set sail on the
ocean of love Indian Ocean