¡Hola amigos! ¡Me gusta pasar las vacaciones en la playa! Unfortunately, that’s all the Spanish I remember from college. Fortunately, Brad doesn’t need to be bilingual for this “journey” to Costa Rica — he only needs to speak the international language. You know… love! The language of love! (I’ll bet the three of you out there who’ve seen Better off Dead are laughing heartily right now.)
The “ladies” arrive at the tropical resort and — metaphor alert! — there’s a volcano outside their window. So… who’s gonna blow first? Place your bets! Alli must be jet-lagged, because the best compliment she can muster up for Brad when he arrives is that he looks “well-rested.” Making matters worse, she still hasn’t had a one-on-one date — and that’s not going to change today, because Chantal’s name is on the date card. Brad picks her up and leads her by the hand to… a helicopter! Surprise! Even bigger surprise: back at Costa Rican Casa Bachelorette, Michelle Mole Hair is badmouthing Chantal, calling her “over-confident” and “egotistical.” Emily listens patiently. Her mouth says nothing, but her face says, “Please stop talking to me, hateful brunette.”
Meanwhile, in the jungle, Brad and Chantal ride the world’s longest zip line in the pouring rain. They need to get “back on track,” says Chantal, who admits she may have been a bit
psycho emotional during the Las Vegas date. There’s no chance of that today, since she has the Bachelor allllll to herself. Even a sudden downpour on their picnic dinner can’t put a damper on her spirits. “What is it about Chantal and I that every time we’re together it rains?” wonders Brad. (Hint: It might have something to do with the fact that you’re in a country filled with rainforests…) But here on The Bachelor, every cloud has a sexual lining: The rain drives Chantal and Brad back to his room, where he gives her a white button-down shirt to wear… and nothing else. “Good God,” he moans. “You look amazing. I think this is the hottest I’ve seen you.” And Chantal LOVES it. The damp duo coo and cuddle on the couch, until Brad — convinced that Chantal’s histrionics in Sin City were simply the result of a “rough patch” — gives her the rose.
Another wet day dawns (did Team Bachelor save money by booking this Costa Rica trip during the rainy season?) and Jackie, Michelle, Emily, Ashley, Shawntel, and Britt are headed for a canyon excursion with Brad. “It’s all about adventure and facing fear,” says the Bachelor, directing the women to don their helmets and ponchos. “We are rappelling down a waterfall,” announces Brad (though he actually says repelling). Michelle is pissed, because back on their date she made Brad take a Sacred Oath that they would never rappel (or, repel) with anyone else. Oh, buddy, you are going to pay for that betrayal… Wait a minute, you and Michelle are rappelling down together? Nice save, pal. Nice save.
NEXT: Brad takes Alli to the “altar”