After 11 years spent with Sam and Dean, I thought I knew what a sibling disagreement looked like (and it usually involved tears and some time apart). But the Winchesters, simply by nature of being human, have nothing on the sibling dynamics of God and Amara. Turns out, locking your sibling in a cage for all of eternity is pretty much going to ruin your relationship. But at least it makes for interesting TV.
We start the hour with one of my favorite story lines: Lucifer, the angry teen of the situation, demanding an apology from his unfair father…and said unfair father refusing to apologize. And when God won’t give his son what he wants, Lucifer storms off to his — well, really Dean’s — room to listen to some loud music and pout about life. But don’t worry: Dean has seen Dr. Phil. He knows what comes next.
After God whips up some amazing pancakes — did you see how fluffy they were?! — he agrees to sit down and talk with his son. So with Sam and Dean acting as the highly ill-equipped mediators, the father and son decide to talk out their feelings.
It takes God a second to be a “little less lordly” — it’s a struggle considering he’s the Lord — but eventually, he explains that when the Mark of Cain corrupted Lucifer, Lucifer posed a threat to humankind. Because of that, God had no choice but to lock him away. But as Lucifer puts it, “Do you have any idea what it’s like to argue with your father when your father is God?” Just about every answer is going to be along the lines of “it had to be done.” (Although, as Dean points out, that’s not unlike most fathers.)
But when Sam chimes in and explains that Lucifer simply wants an apology and reminds God that this conversation is not about whether God was right, God whooshes the Winchesters away so that he can have a serious chat with his son. “I was supposed to love all creation equally,” God says. “I wasn’t supposed to have favorites, but you, you were mine. I gave you the Mark because I loved you the most. I thought you were strong enough to bear it.” And when God realized that his choice was going to “devour my most cherished son,” he hated himself. And because of that, he punished Lucifer. Finally, Lucifer gets his apology.
So what now? Well, they trap Amara. As God explains, they can’t kill her because he and Amara are kind of like yin and yang. There’s a balance to the universe. “Light needs dark, dark needs light” and whatnot. Killing her would, well, it wouldn’t be good. But how do they trap her?
First things first: They need more soldiers. Last time, the archangels weakened Amara before God finished her off. This time around, there’s not enough time to bring back Gabriel or Raphael — archangels take a bit more effort than most — and Michael is in no condition to fight. So…demons, witches, and regular angels it is.
While Dean goes to hell to get Crowley on board — after his own demons laughed at his plan to make hell great again — Lucifer is off to heaven to convince the angels to help. (And when he fails, he let’s Castiel, his “Jiminy Cricket,” do the work.) As for Rowena, Sam catches her just as she’s working with another witch to head back in time. At first, she’s none too excited to see the “giant,” whom she threatens to turn into an “actual moose” — Crowley’s family really can’t get over his size — but eventually, she comes around, as does her witch friend.
The plan is simple: The witches, demons, and angels will take turns weakening Amara, and God will finish her off. But just as everything starts to come together, Dean’s oh-so-complicated feelings for Amara rise to the surface. He once again asks why they can’t kill her — hoping God will maybe do the thing he can’t — but as Sam puts it, they finally have God on their side for one of these fights, and that means they’re doing it God’s way. You know the saying: God’s way or the highway. Close enough.
Just as Amara eats Donatello’s soul and transports herself to the bunker — where she breaks God’s “World’s Greatest Father” mug and becomes my sworn enemy — the team relocates to some sort of warehouse. After God admits that both Crowley and Rowena have been “guilty pleasures” for him over the years, they once again go over the plan.
After the soldiers weaken her, God will transfer her Mark…to Sam. Seeing as how Dean is already tainted, he can’t bear the Mark, and naturally, Sam volunteered. To be fair, Dean did tell his brother that he’d have to be the one to take Amara down, and this is how Sam can help. Reluctantly, Dean agrees to follow God’s plan.
NEXT: God comes face-to-face with his sister