He’s baaaack! The “he” in question here is John, who took a pretty sketchy hiatus following Kate’s death and disappeared for the last three episodes. How convenient, right? John returns in this week’s episode of Secrets and Lies after being away on “business” — but, as you probably could’ve guessed, it wasn’t that kind of business.
Following his return, John and Eric have a conversation in the latter’s apartment, where John makes a few douchey comments about the way he questioned Kate’s behavior after her death and the way he raised Eric and the gang while their mother was battling alcoholism. He storms out of Eric’s apartment without really apologizing or making things better for himself.
Someone else who’s not really making things better: Melanie. She’s at the police stationed being questioned by (read: flirting with) Major Bryant about what she was doing the night of the party and what reason she may have had for erasing the security footage. She denies all of this, of course, and kind of proves how much she reeeally doesn’t give a sh-t by only explaining to the Major where she bought that “tight, tight” dress she wore to the party.
Melanie also gets a little serious and explains she wasn’t actually leaving the security office… She was leaving the bathroom (allegedly). She claims she left the party on the 10th floor to use the bathroom in the lobby because the line upstairs was a wee bit long. (I feel that, Melanie.) But Major Bryant isn’t buying it, and he tries his hardest to get her to break by telling her they’ve already found her fingerprints on the keyboard in the security office. (That was a lie, btw.) And so was Melanie’s excuse, since it’s pointed out later in the episode there were two bathrooms on that floor (and probably a great deal of bathrooms on every other floor, but I won’t question this joke of an alibi since I’m not the detective here.) Still, Melanie admits Kate was the only Warner who didn’t hate her and, therefore, she would never have a reason to hurt her.
Since we’re already discussing Melanie, remember when May told Eric that Kate caught Neil getting a little up close and personal with her in his office? Well, turns out that was a lie — kind of. See, Kate actually did catch Neil having sex in his office, just not with Melanie. May overheard “she’s my sister-in-law” get thrown out in their conversation and immediately thought Melanie was the “sister-in-law” to whom Kate was referring. But after Amanda shows up to Eric’s apartment to chat, he talks to her about Patrick’s fraud and reveals to her the news of Neil and Melanie’s rendezvous. Too bad the only thing she really took away from that conversation was the bit about Melanie and Neil sleeping together, because she shows up to Neil’s office the next day and gets into a pretty heated argument with him. And that’s kind of when Eric figures out Kate was talking about was Amanda, not Melanie.
Moments later, in an attempt to get the old pals to make up, John leaves Eric and Neil alone in his office to talk things out. That’s when Neil confesses he’s in love with Amanda. They were together back in the day, but obviously, he messed things up. He’s hoping Amanda will give him another chance (especially since she’s currently in the middle of a divorce) but Eric is quick to rain on his parade when he tells Neil that Amanda will never love him back. Ouch. But that’s not important right now. Because, right after their heart-to-heart, they hear John’s second phone ringing in his desk (a flip phone, might I add) and discover a missed call from a cancer treatment center. Eric and Amanda ambush John with this information later, but he explains the phone in his desk actually belongs to someone else and he’s just waiting for May to find the owner. That turns out to be a lie because, duh, what show are you watching?
Meanwhile, Patrick appears from the shadows and finally explains to Eric the reason behind his fraud. Apparently, Patrick knew a guy (note: don’t ever trust anyone who says “I know a guy”) who claimed the Professional Golfers’ Association was really close to certifying a cluster of houses on a golf course. He had the bright idea of investing in the houses and selling them for quadruple the investment once the PGA made the big announcement.
NEXT: Danny kills everyone’s vibe