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Scream Queens recap: Beware of Young Girls

And deans with an ax to grind.

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Patti Perret/Fox

Scream Queens

TV Show
Current Status:
In Season
run date:
Emma Roberts, Lea Michele
Comedy, Horror

Now that the World Series of baseball is over, we can return to our regularly scheduled World Series of sorority sleuthing. Except, well, this episode of Scream Queens didn’t bring us much closer to uncovering the identity (or identities) of the Red Devil — despite an amusing detour into the machinations of Dean Munsch’s personal life, co-starring everyone’s favorite rookie Tavi Gevinson in a fun guest turn. 

We open with Chanel No. 2’s funeral (you’ll recall her body was found in that gruesome haunted house a few weeks back), and with her parents off on a celebratory cruise, arrangements fall to Chanel, whose eulogy isn’t exactly a sparkling snapshot of No. 2’s time on Earth. “This is what happens when you rub uglies with my man,” she hisses at the open casket. 

And though her remains are ostensibly cremated and shot into space (per her wishes), No. 2 isn’t out of this world quite yet. No, the girls use a ouija board to communicate with her spirit. After all, No. 2 must know the identity of her killer, right? All she really reveals, though, is that Chad is cheating on Chanel (which, honestly, doesn’t seem like that much of an after-life epiphany). 

Meanwhile, Gigi is at Wes’ house and playing the good girlfriend, yet clearly scheming with her minions over the phone. (I’ll bet a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air-approved jacket that Boone is on the other end of the line.) Anyway, Gigi and Grace decide to do a bit of shop-bonding, each of them with their own motive for the excursion. Grace wants intel from Gigi; Gigi wants to throw Grace off her scent (and on to Dean Munsch’s), so she offers up a sacrificial lamb: Feather McCarthy (played by Gevinson). 

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Here’s Feather’s story: She’s a former Kappa who fell in love with the Beatles 101 professor, who just so happened to be Dean Munsch’s husband. “He wasn’t attractive at all,” Feather tells Grace and Pete. “But, I mean, he was the Beatles professor, so we started having sex.” Once or twice a week — he was in his mid-50s, after all! Mr. Munsch eventually left the Dean and moved into KKT to live with Feather. But Dean Munsch started single-white-femaling Feather, finally — allegedly — trying to zap Feather by pushing one of those old iPod things you plug in into her bath. Feather’s story heaps plenty of suspicion on Dean Munsch, and when Grace and Pete ask if the one-time sorority sister will go on the record for their newspaper story, she agrees. 

A bad idea, it turns out, because when Feather returns home, she finds a “ketchup” arrow on the foyer floor, pointing upstairs. She follows, uncovering further instructions…and body parts nailed to the walls! She finally pushes open the bedroom door and discovers Mr. Munsch’s head in the fish tank. Yep, he’s sleeping with the fishes.

NEXT: Sugar party