Didn’t this odd hour of Tuesday night TV feel like one of those extra mash-up episodes of Housewives Bravo likes to air after the reunion special? It was mostly odds and ends, from the adorable (I’m no fan but Miss Joyce hop scotching with her daughter and granddaughter was awful sweet) to the asinine (purple vibrators). In one stoic bleat of obnoxiousness on Kandi Koated Nights! Charles Grant managed to alienate all of Atlanta’s female population, to say nothing of Honda Civic drivers. “I think women in Atlanta don’t preserve themselves quite as well as they should,” he said. “They sell their souls too fast. Carry yourself like you a hooker, you’re going to be treated like a hooker. Atlanta a pretend city. Everyone wants to be somebody.” And Marlo, who I’m unsure if Bravo is building up to be an actual character on the show, remains a mystery. How did she get her money together? Was it from the help of God or an old white sugar daddy as Kandi suggested? I smell a Big Poppa cameo! Ugh, smells like hair oil and old licorice.
Bob , that clever tom cat, got the jump on Sheree. He served her with a petition to modify his child support, declaring that his salary has shrunk from $20,000 to $3,000 a month. Sheree took the paperwork into Phaedra who reminded her friend that she still had the option of tossing his ass in jail for failing to give her a plug nickel over the last four years. But Sheree’s not going there so Phaedra tells her she will have to defend the petition in court. And honey, she’s going to have to pay for Phaedra’s services too. (Business transactions amongst friends are always tricky things. Was Sheree being billed when Phaedra was marveling over her donkey boot in that black suit?) It hurt to see our lioness Sheree so flattened by the thought of meeting Bob in court again. She leaked throughout the episode, terrified of getting screwed over again by a court system overly impressed by her ex-husband’s local reputation history on the football field.
Phaedra will go to the mat for her friend, but it will cost her. “Everybody in Atlanta knows,” purred Phaedra, “Sheree has had some issues with attorneys and paying their fees in the past.” Oh honey, you’re going to pay for that one at the reunion. It took a few employees, and a trip to the salon, but Sheree finally did come through with that money. On the morning of her court appearance, Sheree cried into her makeup mirror, trying desperately to gain strength from a neon green smoothie. “I dunno Phaedra,” she said softly into the phone, wiping at her sad deer eyes. She’s not ready to go through this again, unsure if she has the energy for another messy battle that doesn’t go her way. “Today is going to be one of the easiest days you’ve ever had,” Phaedra promised. Then a sleepy Kairo wandered out of his room and the mood got even worse and I wasn’t sure who I would want to hug first if I was there.
NEXT: Phaedra gets blindsided.